Asperger’s Syndrome

Named after Hans Asperger, the pediatrician who first described its symptoms, Asperger’s is a part of an umbrella of neurological and social conditions called “autism spectrum disorders.” Asperger’s Syndrome (AS) is more difficult to identify and diagnose than many autism-related disorders, mostly because symptoms can be attributed to many other conditions. But the diagnosis of AS is usually empowering, as persons with Asperger’s typically have an easier time mainstreaming than those with other autism spectrum disorders.

The onset of the disease is usually at 3 to 5 years old.

What is Asperger’s Syndrome?
Asperger’s Syndrome (also called Asperger’s Disorder) is a neurological condition characterized by:

Severe Impairment in Social Interaction and Skills
People with Asperger’s tend to be self-focused (which is not to say they are self-centered). They prefer to be alone and have very little need for companionship. They are more interested in their inner musings, and are prone towards introspection and daydreaming. They can appear rude when spoken to, and may have difficulty following the subtext of a conversation (they can’t “read between the lines”). They can be very selective  when it comes to associating with peers or adults. Additionally, many kids and adults with AS are prone to random bursts of temper.

Limited Repetitive Behavior
People with Asperger’s are also prone to various obsessions and narrow interests. For instance, they might be interested in  parts of objects (like clocks) or they might like spinning things over and over and over. They flap their hands (particularly when excited).  Some children with Asperger’s are called “little professors,”  as they like to recite to others (as if teaching) whatever it is they are currently obsessing about.

Lack of Emotional Reciprocity
People with Asperger’s have difficulty identifying their own emotions as well as empathizing with other people. They can’t read non-verbal cues that communicate feelings, and may even appear cold and dismissive of other’s distress or pain. They are also poor at using non-verbal cues themselves such as maintaining eye contact, showing appropriate facial expressions or using gestures naturally. Not surprisingly, considering all this, people with AS have trouble making friends. However, they often don’t care so much about this as they are not all that interested in social relationships.

People with Asperger’s Syndrome tend to have excellent language and cognitive skills, and may even excel in areas they obsess on. Some may have motor problems and clumsiness.

What Can Parents Do?
If parents suspect that their child may have Asperger’s, the best thing to do is to get a diagnosis by a qualified mental health practitioner. Developmental psychologists, as well as psychiatrists, are generally competent at diagnosing autism spectrum disorders, but it’s always better to consult one who specializes in the disease. Because Asperger’s is primarily biological in origin (it is not caused by trauma nor by bad parenting), it has an early onset; symptoms that look like Asperger’s, but appear later in life, are unlikely to stem from Asperger’s Disorder.

Early intervention is critical in managing Asperger’s Syndrome. Currently, there are no cures for the illness, but medications and therapy can assist in managing symptoms. Many with AS are able to live highly functioning and productive lives. It does help for parents and other care-providers to be educated about their children’s particular needs. Training in social and communication skills, as well as occupational therapy can help with the various symptoms of AS.

Teething

Teething refers to the eruption of new teeth in the baby, a developmental milestone that usually first occurs around 6 – 10 months of age although sometimes starts as early as 3 months. Some babies teeth appear one at a time. Others cut several teeth simultaneously. Teething is usually a painless process. However, some babies do experience uncomfortable symptoms. For instance, there can be loss of appetite, sleeplessness, ear pulling, gum rubbing, coughing, and possibly a low fever. Drooling may cause an uncomfortable  rash around the mouth. Some infants and toddlers  experience significant soreness, swelling and even blisters in their gums during this period. It is common (and understandable) for babies and toddlers to be more distressed and irritable than usual when they are teething.

If your baby is in the process of teething, consider the following tips:

Unhappy Babies
Parents are advised to be more patient and sensitive to their child’s changing moods and needs during the teething stage. Infants can become so distressed with teething pains that they cry all the time. Teething may also result in behavior traditionally associated with infant distress, such as clinging to Mom or refusing to be separated. Try to be patient – your little one will become more independent and happy again when the tooth finally appears. However, as many teeth need to cut through, you can realistically expect to have to settle and soothe your teething baby off and on for almost 3 years! There are likely to be some hard days and nights. Even so, these will be scattered between the happier, pain-free periods, giving both you and your baby a much welcomed break!

How to Help Your Teething Baby
Fortunately, there are many things parents can do to help. If there is inflammation, applying something cold to the gums usually helps. Gently rubbing ice cubes in the area where the tooth is about to come out has been known to soothe pain. There are also teething toys, such as teething rings, that you can place in the freezer for an additional chill. Frozen washcloths and cold water are also good alternatives. Some parents have found cold foods such as yogurt and chilled applesauce to be helpful. If none of the above work for your baby, you can try using Infant Tylenol and other infant medicines. Your pediatrician may recommend a specific product.

Traditional means of soothing a distressed infant are also recommended during this stage. At this time, traditional comforts such as holding and rocking are definitely in order. Providing additional stimulation, such as a gentle massage, may also prove a valid distraction to a baby that is teething.

Making Temporary Adjustments
If the soreness is interfering with the infant’s ability to eat and drink, parents might have to make some temporary changes in the child’s diet or feeding style. For instance, a child on solids may need a temporary liquid diet until chewing becomes more comfortable again. Offering the child cold water in between feedings can also help. In some cases, giving a child something solid to bite on is very helpful (avoid choking hazards of course!).

The good news is that teething eventually comes to an end. For most kids, the stage passes uneventfully with minor symptoms requiring little or no intervention.

Wakes Up Too Frequently

Like adults, children can wake up in the night.  They may do so for any number of reasons, depending on their age, health and unique characteristics. However, when a child awakens in the night, other members of the household may be disturbed (i.e. siblings sleeping nearby or parents in their own room). If nighttime awakenings happen only on rare occasions, it’s not a big problem. But what if a child routinely wakens in the night and does so more than one time?

If your child wakes up too frequently, consider the following tips:

Babies Naturally Wake Up Often
Newborns and infants wake to feed every 90 minutes or so. There’s not much that can be done for this age group; they’re SUPPOSED to wake up in the night every couple of hours. The best solution for tired parents is to try to catch a few naps in the daytime. Sleep when the baby sleeps in those early weeks and for as long as you can manage it. Some people are able to afford night nurses so that they can sleep through those night wakings, but many cannot. Some couples trade off in the night, so that each one only loses half the sleep. Some people take the newborn into bed with them, finding this less exhausting than having to get out of bed and walk down the hall to another room, or even to get out of bed and go to the baby’s cradle in the same room. Some folks can afford daytime help that allows them to take a generous snooze in daylight hours. Those who have only the one baby or other kids in school, can and should try to nap when the baby naps. The good news is that this stage of life eventually passes and babies will sleep for longer stretches. Some babies will actually sleep right through the night from 8 or 9 months of age. Some will accomplish this later – say at 14 or 16 months. And some, will not sleep right through the night until they are 6 years old!

Toddlers Still Seek Parental Comfort at Night
While some toddlers sleep through the night without interruption, there are many who don’t. In this latter group, some children awaken just once and then settle back to sleep for the night. Some want a little parental presence, while some want a lot (i.e. they want to climb into the parents’ bed). If parents provide that presence (either by letting him in their bed or by patting him back to sleep), some of these little ones will just go back to sleep for the rest of the night. If you are fine with that, go ahead and let it happen. All kids eventually outgrow the need and desire to sleep in their parents’ bed. However, if you prefer to train your child to stay in his own room for the duration of the night, you will have to do a bit of nighttime sleep training.

To begin with, you need to understand that parental touch and presence is comforting and pleasant for small children. When little kids enter a light sleep cycle, they often call out for this touch or presence. If parents are willing to pat the child back to sleep, or talk to him or hold him and rock him, then the little night-waker may expect this service each time he wakes up in the night. In order not to have to provide it, you will want to create a scenario in which the child must soothe HIMSELF back to sleep. Once you accomplish that, the little one will put himself back to sleep after waking in the night.

Parental Consistency is Key
Put your little one to bed in the usual way. Provide a night light, soft toy and other comforts and then leave the room. If the child wakes up and calls for you, you can come to the room – but do not pick up the child or touch him. Simply tell him that it’s late and he should go back to sleep. Then leave. If he calls again, wait a bit and then come back and tell him the same thing. Don’t stand too close – it’s best to stand in the doorway. Each time he calls for you, wait a little longer before coming. The idea is to provide reassuring presence without providing reinforcing contact. When the child figures out that he’s not going to get much out of this and it’s getting to be hard work for little payoff, he usually stops calling for parents and just stays asleep. Keep in mind that if you decide to do this with your child, you cannot interrupt the process by taking the child into your bed. Some parents make exceptions and let the child come into their bed when he is sick or when he has been crying for a long time or even when THEY are just too tired to deal with it. Providing these exceptions causes the child to learn that it’s worth staying up and screaming for as long as possible because it might just yield some positive results! If you take the child into your room even once in awhile, it can become impossible to get him to stop waking up in the night.

School-Aged Children Wake for Different Reasons
When bigger children are waking up frequently in the night, there is something wrong. Some kids are fearful of sleeping in their own room or being separated from their parents. Whereas such feelings are common for two and three year-olds, their existence in kids over six might indicate the presence of some anxiety. A mental health professional should be consulted. Some kids wake up because of various health problems. Always have a pediatrician do a full workup to determine if a physical condition is causing the frequent waking. For instance, it is possible that the child suffers from a breathing difficulty known as “sleep apnea.” If doctors have agreed that there is no emotional or physical cause for frequent nighttime awakenings, then you can safely use behavioral interventions to help the child. As for younger children, make it clear that you expect the child to stay in his or her own room. Let the child know that YOU need your sleep and you will NOT be tending to his or her needs once it’s night. Provide the child with books, crayons or puzzles to entertain him or herself with, should awakening occur. Make it clear that no one can be disturbed, including other children in the house. When the child sees that everyone is sleeping and no one is coming to look after him or her, the child usually decides to stay asleep. However, if your child insists on coming into your room and disturbing you, feel free to inform him or her that causing you to wake up will result in a (significant) negative consequence the next day. If necessary, be sure to apply the consequence (show the child you mean business!). Be consistent. Apply the consequence each day that follows night time disturbance. Hopefully, the child will soon get your point. If he or she fails to learn, see a professional counselor for further suggestions.

Sleep Routines While Travelling

A holiday or vacation with children is not always completely relaxing. One of the challenges in travelling with kids is their reaction to the disruption of their normal sleep patterns and routines. Children are often even more sensitive than adults to sleep cues – like their own room, their own bed and their regular times for lying down and getting up. All of this is gone once they leave the comfort of home and many kids find it very hard to settle down to sleep as a result. Add to this the normal challenges of travel such as change in diet, the stress of travel itself and adjusting to changes in time zones and you often find yourself with a crew of cranky, sleepless kids!

How can parents help their babies, toddlers and children adjust to sleep disturbances during holidays and vacations?

Minimize the Changes in Their Sleep Routine
In all situations, adjusting to change is easier when change is kept to a minimum. If they nap in the afternoon, then plan activities around their afternoon nap. If they sleep until 10 am, then don’t travel until ten. If they like to sleep with lots of pillows and toys around them, make sure you pack those extra pillows and toys. The less change, the better.

Prepare Them for the Change
Infants can be gradually desensitized to changes in routine, so that the vacation or holiday is not a shock for them. For example, if your destination has a warmer climate than where you live, then turn the temperature in their room a fraction of a degree higher in the days before your trip. If they will be sleeping in a large bed at a hotel instead of a crib, then transfer them to your bed the week before the holiday. If your children are old enough, show them pictures of the place you are travelling to including the city and the place where you will be staying. If you have a picture of the bedroom you’ll be using, all the better! Sometimes you will be able to provide actual photos (for example, when you pick a hotel on an Internet travel site or when you are staying with relatives and you have photo’s of their home and town), and sometimes you’ll be able to use pictures of the city garnered from computer or travel books.

Consider Bach Flower Remedies
The Bach Flower Remedy Walnut can be given to a child 4 times a day starting the week before traveling in order to help the child adjust more easily to changes in routines, foods, and environment. Walnut is the transition flower, increasing a person’s flexibility and making change easier on the body and mind. Bach Flower Remedies are available at health food stores and on-line. Two drops in a small glass of liquid, given 4 times a day, is the optimal dosage. You can find more information on the Bach Flower Remedies online, in books, and throughout this site.

Expect Over-Excitement at First
Many adults have trouble sleeping in a new environment and travelling kids usually have more trouble. They are often overstimulated by the new experiences they are encountering and overexcited about the trip. This affects their brain chemistry, making it much harder for them to relax their little bodies and minds enough to settle into a quality sleep. If they’re too “wide awake” the first night or two of travel, don’t insist that they go to bed; they’re just going to lie awake for hours waiting for their adrenaline to settle! Let them stay up a little later, but wake them at the regular time in the morning. After a couple of nights, they should be good and tired and more able to sleep despite continued feelings of excitement.

Bring the Usual Gear
The place may not be familiar to your child, but the bedding, pillowcases, blanket and huggable toys can be the same. If you can bring stuff that kids associate with their sleep routine at home to your holiday or vacation, it won’t hurt and it just might help!

Be Flexible
If your very young children wish to sleep with you (in your room or in your bed) while on a short vacation, it’s fine to let them do it. They’ll be home soon and you can get them back into their normal routines in their own rooms. However, vacation stays can be so disorienting that small children really need the comfort and stability of their parents near by. This isn’t the time to insist on independence. Try to provide the kids with the security they need. You can (and should be) firm, once you get home.

Gradually Ease Them Out of the Holiday Routine Upon Getting Home
Kids don’t just need to adjust during your holiday proper; they may also need to adjust upon returning home! This is especially true if the vacation is bit long, like the entire summer. Upon getting home, be flexible. If your child is still attached to the vacation routine, just try to wean him or her out of it slowly. It helps to allow a week’s transition time between the vacation and daycamp or school, just so that the child can get used to going to sleep and waking up on a stricter, probably earlier, schedule.

Premature Babies

The birth of a premature baby can bring mixed emotions: the joy of the newborn’s arrival and the worry over health issues. Sometimes, when the premature birth is completely unexpected, there is also a feeling of shock and panic. Will the baby survive? Will she be alright? Indeed, some premature babies literally have to fight for their life in a neonatal intensive care unit. Some parents feel responsible: did we do something wrong while pregnant? Even when the early birth is clearly accepted as out of the parent’s control, parents may begin to feel the pressure that accompanies caring for any “special needs” child. They know their child is more fragile than an average infant and may face more developmental challenges. Their radar goes up – they are more vigilant. Since caring for a full term baby is already an intensive, exhausting process, it is easy to imagine how caring for a premature baby can sometimes challenge parents to their max.

If you are the parent of a premature infant who has health issues, take heart: both the survival rate and the prognosis for healthy development among preemies is now excellent. With the right medical intervention and adequate postnatal care, preemies tend to do very well indeed. Although your task might feel overwhelming at first, it will get easier (if you can call parenting a baby “easy” at any stage!). Let’s take a closer look at the phenomenon of premature births:

What is a Premature Baby?
A baby is considered premature when he or she is born before 37 weeks of pregnancy. It is estimated that around 500,000 babies (or about 9%) of live births in America each year are premature. Because preemies are born ahead of schedule, it is possible that they will suffer from temporary health concerns brought about by inadequate pre-natal development. The bigger the gap between actual and anticipated birth date, the more serious the health problems tend to be. However, because of the sophistication of modern medical interventions, almost all such health issues can be adequately addressed. Indeed, almost all preemies survive their initial struggle and grow up to be indistinguishable from the rest of the population.

Common Health Issues of Premature Babies
A common health condition of preemies is hyperbilirubinemia affecting 80% of prematurely born infants. Babies with hyperbilirubinemia have a high amount of bilirubin (a compound resulting from the natural breakdown of blood). Babies with hyperbilirubinemia are placed under special lights that help the body get rid of bilirubin. Other common health problems of premature infants include: sleep apnea, respiratory distress syndrome, infection, bronchopulmonary dysplasia, anemia, low blood pressure, retinopathy of prematurity and patent ductus arteriosus. These conditions all respond well to medical treatment.

What to Expect
Premature Babies are placed in the neonatal intensive care unit (NICU) until the infant can go home. After leaving the NICU most babies will still require special care. Frequent examinations will be made to make sure that the baby is developing in a completely healthy way.

Premature babies generally come home from the hospital at the time of their original due date. Premature babies will need to feed 8-10 times a day at first. It’s important not to wait longer than 4 hours in between the feeding times in order to prevent dehydration. Breastfeeding is one of the best ways to protect an infant from germs and sickness, during the first months after birth. Making sure to keep on track with feeding times is crucial – even if it is necessary to wake a sleeping baby. The baby may not give clear signs that she is hungry so frequent feeding is necessary even in the absence of signs of hunger. Premature babies should not begin eating solids until 4-6 months after their due date (not birthday), in order to be able to swallow.

Premature babies will sleep more often than normal babies, but they will wake up after shorter intervals of time. They may sleep up to 22 hours a day during their first weeks at home. The baby should be put to sleep on her back. Remember that when a preemie reaches an adjusted age of 6 to 8 months, she should be able to sleep through the night.

In premature infants, the baby’s ability to control bodily movements often lags behind the development of senses (hearing, touching, seeing). Parents needn’t worry if their baby has trouble holding his head up or making smooth, coordinated movements with his limbs – this will all develop in time. In fact, the premature baby may develop slower than a full-term baby in many ways. It may take up to two years to catch up with children who were born on their expected birth date.

What Causes a Premature Birth?
There are many possible reasons why a baby may have been born early. However, most cases of prematurity are caused by unknown factors and factors outside the parents’ control. Indeed, in the majority of cases of premature birth, doctors have no warning sign that a premature birth is likely. And most parents are similarly taken by surprise by their early labor. Nonetheless, we do know some conditions that can lead to higher chances of premature births – some of which can be avoided in future pregnancies and some of which are outside of the parents’ control. Undiagnosed problems in the uterus or the cervix can cause early labor. Twins are often born prematurely. Maternal obesity, diabetes and hypertension can also increase the risk of giving birth ahead of schedule. Poor diet, lack of folic acid, smoking, drinking alcohol or taking illegal and regulated drugs are other  risk factors. Mothers with a history of taking medication designed to induce abortions may also be at risk for giving birth to a premature child.

How can parents help themselves and their new baby?

There are many things parents of premature babies can do to help their child and one another. Consider the following:

Deal with Your Emotions
As mentioned, parents go through many conflicting feelings when a preemie is born. It helps to be able to express fear, upset or grief over the situation. Often, hospital social services are available to ease the shock and pain and provide practical support. But parents can do each other a big favor by just letting each other talk it out – without offering reassurance, correction or any other comment. Listening to each other non-judgmentally is the greatest gift of all. Providing practical support to each other – helping each other find ways to relax, rest and refresh – will also do wonders for both parents.

Be Involved
Stay close and get informed about your preemie’s condition. Because they were born before term, premature babies may be suffering from various health issues – some easily managed by the medical team and on rare occasion, some that cause conditions that can be critical. It helps for parents to learn what they can about their baby’s status; knowledge reduces the sense of overwhelm and helplessness. Often, parents can help their premature baby by spending time in the neonatal intensive care unit. Touching the infant may be a simple but effective way of providing valuable stimulation.

Make Arrangements for a Healthy Home
Even when the preemie has been released from the hospital, he or she is still vulnerable to infections and opportunistic diseases. It’s important then that parents invest in making their home suitable for their premature baby. Pollutants in the household that wouldn’t otherwise harm a baby born to term may be intolerable for your infant. Consult your doctor on how to best prepare your home for your little one.

Know What to Expect
It’s not unusual for premature babies to experience some developmental delay. For instance, milestones typical of a child 6-7 months of age may be achieved by a premature baby later. Premature babies also tend to behave differently than babies born to term; for example some may have difficulty expressing their needs through crying, especially in the early weeks. Some preemies will need interventions as they develop. For instance, many will benefit from speech therapy or occupational therapy for gross and fine motor coordination. Sometimes a preemie will go on to have learning disabilities that will require attention as well. However parents need to be aware that many children who are born at full term also need various interventions as they grow up and not all developmental quirks are caused by prematurity. Like the rest of the full term population, preemies can have the full range of human challenges simply because they’re human! It is important for parents to help their child outgrow the “preemie” designation over the course of the first few years of life. Continuing to treat the child as particularly fragile or vulnerable long past the challenges of the early days does more harm than good.

Sometimes intervention services such as physical, occupational, speech therapy, or developmental therapy may be helpful during the first couple of years after birth, enhancing progress and preventing delays or developmental deficits.

 

Biting

Everyone is challenged by frustration, viagra buy no matter what his or her age may be. Frustrated kids physically attack their siblings; frustrated teenagers talk back to their parents; and frustrated adults say and do all kinds of things they later regret. However, recipe no one except for toddlers has any excuse for engaging in hurtful behaviors! Toddlers lash out because they’re too little and too verbally challenged to handle their upset in more mature ways. Still, it is the job of parents to teach their small children both how to refrain from aggressive behaviors and also how to express anger in acceptable ways.

Frustrated Toddlers
The first lessons in frustration management begin when a child is just out of babyhood. Babies get frustrated due to fatigue, hunger, tummy upset, physical discomfort, wanting to be held and so forth. The only thing they can do about it is cry. Once a child learns a few words, he has a few more options. Instead of just crying, he can say things like “no want” or “want Mommy.” By communicating his or her needs, the child will be less frustrated and will be able to release a bit of the frustration that he or she encounters. As the toddler acquires a more elaborate vocabulary, it becomes more and more possible for him or her to reduce and relieve frustration.

However, the baby ways will still persist for a while as well. For example, frustrated toddlers will still sometimes be at a loss for words and just cry in frustration instead. Sometimes they will thrash about like earlier versions of themselves, flailing and stamping their feet. Often they’ll throw an item (a toy, some food or other object). Although these early expressions of frustration are normal in toddlers, parents still must intervene with “frustration education.” Even little kids can begin to learn to express their frustration in words.

Discovering that Biting “Works”
Many toddlers learn quite accidentally, that biting or otherwise hurting someone, is a particularly satisfying way to release feelings of helpless anger and frustration. At first, such a behavior is the product of desperation, adrenalin and infantile problem-solving skills. However, learning occurs rapidly when the toddler discovers the “power” of his or her violent action. The victim screams in sudden pain! The toddler realizes that he or she can actually use violence on purpose in order to communicate strong emotion.

Although many toddlers limit the use of their power to other people their size, they can and do also try it out on their caregivers. While they will sometimes attack teachers and babysitters, their favorite targets are often their parents. How should parents handle a biting/kicking/scratching/hurting toddler?

Helping Toddlers Stop Biting
Toddlers are too young for “real” discipline. Although some two-year-olds seem to understand the concept of negative consequences (i.e. “if you hit Mommy you’ll have to sit in a thinking chair”), most very small children do not really benefit from formal discipline. Discipline becomes more effective after around the age of 3. Even then, parents are just introducing the structure of discipline in tiny steps to these youngest candidates. Although many parents put a child in a crib for a few moments for biting, this strategy usually acts only to stop the present moment aggression. It is a “time-out” that  does virtually nothing to prevent the biting behavior in the future. Discipline that doesn’t “cure” the behavior is not discipline at all and should not be used (the word “discipline” means “to teach” – if the strategy is not teaching the child not to bite, there is no point in using it). However, there are always exceptions: if you’re child is biting less often because you have given him or her a time-out or another punishment, then your intervention IS working and you can continue to use it.

Most parents of toddlers will have to refrain from using discipline for biting and instead, address the misbehavior by managing attention. This means that a parent gives strong, positive attention to desirable behaviors and little or very mild attention to undesirable behaviors (like biting). (Distraction can also be used in these early years to simply steer a child away from undesirable or unacceptable activities that are not aggressive or hurtful.) There is a natural tendency, however, for parents to give LOTS of attention to undesirable behaviors. For instance, they may actually yell at a child who is biting. That yelling is an overdose of attention, sure to encourage lots more biting! Parents have to overcome their natural tendencies in order to restrain themselves when their youngster bites them, other adults or other children.

When Toddlers Bite Caregivers
It is essential that a child be stopped immediately from being aggressive toward his or her caregivers for several reasons. Parents must be seen as benevolent authority figures. This allows them to lovingly guide the development of their youngsters, teaching them right from wrong. A child must therefore learn early that he or she is not to attack the parent either physically or verbally. It is just as out-of-line to do so as it would be for an adult to attack a police officer physically or verbally! In addition, children need their parents’ affection in order to develop optimally. However, parents don’t tend to like their aggressive, violent youngsters as much as they like their cooperative, respectful ones. Teaching the child to be respectful is therefore in the child’s best interest – for this reason as well as myriad other reasons. The lesson begins right at the beginning; even small children are not permitted to behave obnoxiously. Of course, toddlers and pre-schoolers will all behave quite badly at times, but parents must step in and begin the process of gentle, but firm, loving guidance. It’s just not O.K. to bite parents, babysitters, teachers or other caregivers.

Toddlers can be discouraged from biting adults by experiencing the withdrawal of positive attention. Parents can display a strong differentiation between their normal, pleasant, kind, loving selves and their very displeased, uninterested self that comes forth when the child bites or hits. Thus, they may be playing happily with the child when something happens that causes the child to become violent. Now the parent looks seriously displeased, uses a very brief stern reprimanding “NO!” and quickly moves away  from the youngster. The parent should not engage in any sort of lecture or education (this actually provides too much attention for the misbehavior which can accidentally reinforce or encourage more of that behavior.) The parent should also not use a sing-song, soft voice, gently breathing out “no-o-o-o-o, don’t bite Mommy.” The voice must be short and firm (not angry). The facial expression should not be  friendly or gentle, but rather very business-like. This sort of “rejection” (really, more a temporary withdrawal of otherwise flowing positive affection) should not be used for other types of misbehavior, but only reserved for a child’s physically hurtful, aggressive actions (like biting). The trick here is to reserve the icy cold rejecting voice for this one behavior only. The child must immediately see that this is a behavior that the parent doesn’t like. It is essential that the contrast between this harsh face of the parent and the parent’s normal, regular, routine and consistent pleasant face be strong and clear. If the parent is routinely displeased, regularly irritated, often angry, etc., then there will be insufficient contrast to be able to effectively use this technique. Most toddlers who are used to a parent’s gentle, loving ways, will quickly learn to refrain from biting and hurting when this differentiation strategy is employed.

When Toddlers Bite Other Children
A similar use of withdrawal of attention can be used when a child bites another child. If the biting occurs in the school setting, parents should ask the teacher NOT to speak to the child about the biting behavior. Remember: one-on-one time with the teacher, intense direct eye-contact and a few minutes of speaking to the child all constitutes a highly reinforcing form of attention. With all that “quality time” with the teacher, the youngster is much more likely to bite again. Instead, the teacher should say only two words – “No biting” – and have the child sit in a time-out chair facing away from the classroom activity (i.e. facing a wall) for a couple of minutes. The other, non-biting children will be getting the teacher’s attention and the little biter will have lost a few minutes of attention.

The same sort of intervention can be used at home: everyone else remains “part of the scene” but the biting toddler is given the cold shoulder. As discussed above, the “thinking chair” can be used with children 3 years old and up.

If the toddler bites another child, the VICTIM should be given all the attention. The victim’s parent or caregiver should be given lots of apologies in the form of “I’m so sorry – we’ll be doing something about this after the play-date – we’re working on preventing this behavior.” If it is O.K. with the parent or caregiver, the victim can be offered a treat as compensation. Meanwhile the little biter gets virtually NO attention and certainly no treats! Minimizing words, eye contact and physical contact to a biting toddler is one way to strongly discourage the behavior in the future.

Frequent Biters
Consider Bach Flower Therapy for a child who frequently bites others. The remedies Impatiens, Cherry Plum, Chestnut Bud, Holly and Vine can be used. However, it is best to consult a Bach Flower Practitioner to create an appropriate, individually tailored remedy bottle that can help reduce the biting tendency in your toddler. You can find more information about Bach Flower Remedies online and throughout this site.

If your child is not responding to your interventions and is so aggressive that he or she is being “expelled” from nursery schools, then consult a mental health professional for further guidance.

Toilet Training

Learning to use the potty is a huge developmental milestone for a baby. Putting the little guy in underwear even changes his look from “baby” to “kid.” It makes him or her “one of us.” The baby is usually as proud of this accomplishment as the parents.

There are many ways for parents to help their babies learn how to use a potty or toilet. However, there are some important parenting principles that will apply no matter what method of toilet training is used. Every child will eventually get out of diapers and start to wear underpants. What most parents don’t realize is that the way they train the child teaches him much more than how to use the toilet!

When is My Child Ready for Potty Training?
Parents are teaching toddlers how to be people, how to handle life, how to show love and approval. They do this teaching through feeding, holding, diapering and—yes—toilet training! It’s the way  parents do all this that conveys a wealth of information about life to the tiny tot. Is the parent a gentle teacher? Or rough? Rushed or patient? Calm or stressed out? Does the parent respect the child’s feelings or trod over them with a steam roller?

Potty training is a powerful venue for all of these lessons. To begin with, the very timing of potty training shows whether or not parents are in tune with their youngsters’ rhythms and emotions. Parents who start before the child is ready may have their own agenda that they are trying to impose on the baby. It’s more about what the parent needs or wants than what is actually right for the child. In some cultures, this is simply a practical need of parents—in places where there is no easy way to wash diapers, for example. In our culture, it can be about desiring a “natural” way of parenting or it can be a desire to show off one’s baby’s “talent.” Whatever the case, attempting to train a child before the child is physically ready (which typically occurs somewhere between 18 months & 24 months) is not acting in concert with the child’s development. This can also be the case when parents wait too long to start toilet training a youngster. Some parents are not eager to train their babies because they know that the process itself can be time-consuming and messy and that it will rob them of some sense of control of their own schedule. Having to run to the bathroom all day with a toddler-in-training is indeed inconvenient. Parents can change diapers more or less according to their own schedule and convenience. Parents who feel overwhelmed with the demands of their other tasks may therefore decide to wait awhile in the hopes that the child will train himself eventually. Unfortunately, many parents miss the toilet-sensitive period this way. They are out of touch with their child’s stage of development.

Tuning into the child’s readiness level is an important parenting skill. It applies to everything that a parent wants to teach a youngster. The optimum time for teaching is when the child shows the prerequisite skill set. Waiting too long can mean that the child will have more trouble learning the skill or may never quite get it. This is as true for teaching children how to clean their rooms as it is for toilet training!

When is a Child Ready to be Trained? There are Several Signs:

  • The child is dry for longer periods of time during the day
  • The child has a couple of well-formed bowel movements during the day instead of frequent loose movements
  • The child stops having bowel movements in her night diaper
  • The child has the dexterity to run to the bathroom and to pull off clothing
  • The child already knows how to follow simple instructions and is cooperative (i.e. is not thick into the defiant “no” stage that is typical of early toddlerhood).

Most of these developmental tasks occur naturally around 2 years of age. Although there are individual differences, the order of control usually goes like this:

  • The child stops having night-time bowel movements
  • The child attains daytime bowel control
  • The child attains daytime bladder control
  • The child attains night-time bladder control

Parents can help a child get ready for training by teaching some potty words. For instance, when the diaper is wet, a parent can say, “Oh you made a pee.” When it is dirty, the parent can say “Oh you made a poo (or word of your choice).” When the child is obviously having a bowel movement, the parent can say “You’re making a poo? O.K. when you’re done we’ll change your diaper.” During this stage, the parent can begin to bring picture books home from the store or library that show babies going through the potty-training process. This “bibliotherapy” (use of books to help reduce anxiety and create readiness) can be very helpful. Toddlers love to look at picture books and read them over and over and over again. The frequent exposure helps them become familiar with the steps they will soon be going through. Once you start formally training your baby, the books will provide added educational support.

Introduce the Function of the Potty or Toilet Chair
When you feel that your child is ready to be toilet trained, you can but a potty chair or a smaller version of the toilet chair designed specifically for toddlers and young children. (Some parents skip the potty chair and goe straight to the toilet; this is fine too.) Start the lesson by encouraging your child to sit on the potty chair, even with his clothes on, so that he can feel comfortable with it.

Then you can begin introducing to your toddler what the potty seat is for. For example, you can get the contents of a soiled diaper and dump it into the potty. If you notice from your child’s movements and/or expression that he or she is about to pee or move bowels, then you can take him or her to the seat or toilet to perform the task there.

One method for encouraging use of the toilet or potty is to allow the child to run about the house naked for a few days. When the child begins to urinate or defecate, scoop him or her up and let him or her finish the job on the toilet or potty. Although this method is a bit messy (the floor or carpet may get soiled), it is also very quick and effective. The child quickly learns the right place to deposit his or her goods.

Another trick that some parents use is to show a child how to control the flow of urine in a bathtub. This is particularly suitable for little boy toddlers. When the child wakes up dry from a nap (or, does not have a soaking diaper after a night’s sleep), take the child to the bathtub right away. Turn the tap on to let a little water run. Have the child standing in the middle of the tub, with legs slightly spread. He is most likely to start to urinate. Show pleasure! Tell him that he is making pee-pee (or use whatever words you like). This can serve as the little guy’s introduction to the functions of his body and the control he can exercise over it. After doing this once or a few times, simply take the child straight to the toilet or potty when he wakes up in a fairly dry state.

Consistency is the Key
As in other aspects of parenting, consistency is the key. Once potty-training starts, it needs to be seen through to the end. You can’t put a diaper on the child one day, underpants the next, a diaper when going out, nothing when running around the house. The best way to avoid even wanting to do this is to start potty training when you really feel the child is fully ready. Then, the diaper goes off and it stays off (at least, during the daytime). Some parents put the baby in cloth diapers for a couple of months just so that the child can feel the wetness that he won’t feel in a disposable diaper. This encourages kids to want to stay dry and fresh. Once potty training begins, thick training pants can be used to help avoid large messes while continuing to let the child feel wet.

At first, the parent must guess when the child needs to go to the bathroom. This guess can become fairly accurate by observing the child before training commences and once it begins. How long after eating or drinking does the child typically wet a diaper or the floor? Just before that time, take the child to the potty to try to use it. Don’t make her sit there for more than a few minutes. This just teaches sitting behavior! If nothing happens, take her off and bring her back every 20 minutes until she has been able to produce something. Acknowledge the accomplishment with happy praise. This will be sufficient. Children are very pleased with themselves for managing to use the toilet. There is no need to offer treats for good performance.

Bring the child to the potty as often as you feel you need to in order to avoid having wet clothes or furniture. After a few days, he or she will get the picture. However, it can be months before the child reliably tells YOU that a bathroom break is in order. Praise the child for interrupting himself to go the bathroom. Praise him for having dry underpants throughout the day. Keep the pressure off but keep the expectations up. This means, avoid any show of anger or displeasure but ignore all requests for diapers with a firm “no more diapers.”

Toilet Training Accidents
There is no one smooth accident-free path to toilet training. Along the road to independence from diapers are plenty of accidents—wetting and soiling clothes, floors and furnishings. For parents, this can mean lots of frustration. It is essential that parents remember that they are always teaching their kids more than how to sit on a potty: they are also teaching them everything about how to be a human being, including how to handle setbacks, frustration and upset.. If parents get irritated and impatient and show their frustration in unkind ways (yelling, looking mad, threatening), then little people learn that “it’s my way or the highway; things must go the way I want them to or I become nasty.”On the other hand, if parents just shrug and say “Oops. You’ve had an accident. Let’s clean up.” the child learns that mistakes are not the end of the world, solving a problem is more important than having a problem, people can stay calm in the face of things going wrong and, most important, learning is a gradual process, all about trial and error.

The younger a child is when he starts the training process, the longer it may take him to become accident-free. This just means that parents must be patient longer. Sometimes children develop anxiety around toilet-training. Sometimes it happens because the child is being trained at a late stage where his bowel habits have become entrenched. Most often it occurs in toddlers who have a bit of an anxious streak in their genetic make-up. This group may be fearful, phobic or anxious about other things besides toilet training. The anxiety is almost always about letting go of a bowel movement. Somehow, the diaper provides a safe, familiar experience whereas the potty or toilet seems threatening. Anxious kids often benefit from taking Bach Flower Therapy for a few weeks (you can find more information about Bach Flower Therapy online and throughout this site). This eases the anxiety and then a carefully structured toilet-training process can be undertaken.

Even when a child has been fully trained, accidents will still occur. Even after a child is mostly toilet-trained he or she will often continue to have accidents for a year or two. Just as commonly, a child will be predictably clean and dry for a year and then start to have accidents. This confuses parents who thought that the child was way past the stage of having accidents. However, it often occurs as the child becomes more involved in the world around him and just doesn’t want to interrupt play or activities in order to go to the bathroom. Kids of 5 or even 6 still behave this way on occasion. Don’t use shaming or anger to help cure this behavior. Instead, remind the child to go the bathroom a little more often. Also, when the trained child has an accident, take him or her to the bathroom afterward and make him or her sit on the toilet for a few minutes. This teaches the child that no time will be saved by not going to the bathroom, since he or she will end up having to go in any case.

Nighttime toilet training tends to occur spontaneously. Most kids just start waking up dry. However, many children will not be trained at night till a year or longer after they are daytime trained. And some kids will continue to wet the bed for a very long time, even into adolescence. For concerns about nighttime wetting, talk to your pediatrician. There are various treatments that can help.

No matter how many accidents your child has, keep in mind that your child WILL be completely toilet-trained sooner or later. But most importantly, your child will be emotionally trained as well. Your style of doing potty training gives your child the tools he or she will need for every learning experience.

Always Late

Some people are always late. Children, teens and adults can all be afflicted with the lateness syndrome. If you are always late, cure YOURSELF before trying to cure your child. However, if you’re a prompt parent dealing with an always-late child, consider the following tips:

There Are Many Reasons for Arriving Late
First, let’s differentiate between “excuses” and “reasons.” When a child says she was late for school because her alarm didn’t go off, she is giving an excuse. Blaming traffic, weather conditions, alarm clocks, losing things and so on does not actually explain late behavior – these are all excuses. A reason for lateness is a statement that actuallyexplains why the person is late. For instance, “I didn’t allow enough time for bad traffic conditions,” explains why traffic conditions caused the person to be late. There’s ALWAYS traffic conditions! Why does that make some people late while other people are still on time? Because some people allow enough time for things to go wrong and some people leave themselves no “wiggle room” for ordinary life events. Similarly, weather conditions happen all the time. Failing to allow for weather is what causes only some people to be late while others are still on time. In other words, people who arrive on time understand and utilize the principles of time management whether or not they are doing so consciously. They know that you have to allow for “unforeseen events” every time you make an appointment to be somewhere. If unforeseen events don’t happen, they’ll arrive a little early. They can prepare for that eventuality planning for it – bringing some reading material, handheld devices or whatever, to keep busy for a few minutes before the appointed time arrives. Chronically late people don’t want to wait. Therefore they leave at the last minute so that they’ll arrive “just on time.” This does not allow for the necessary “wiggle time” – they will be late a lot of the time.

There Are No Consequences for Arriving Late
If the school does not give detentions or other immediate punishments for being late, children may not feel that they need to be on time. Or, if the detention period isn’t unpleasant, then the child may not care that he or she received a punishment. Schools who are serious about having kids turn up on time, need to have serious consequences for failure to do so. Similarly, parents may need kids to be ready to leave the house at a certain time so that the parents can leave for work. Dawdlers and late risers can pose a threat to the parent’s job responsibilities. A child who causes the parent to be late because of his or her own slowpoke behavior, needs to suffer appropriate consequences. Use the 2X-Rule (explained in detail in Raise Your Kids without Raising Your Voice by Sarah Chana Radcliffe). Tell the child that if he or she makes you late in the future then there will be a specific punishment (name what that will be). Be consistent in enforcing the negative consequence and be sure that the consequence you are choosing is a true deterrent for the child.

Consider Specific Disabilities That Make Time Management Hard
There are various neurological deficits that can make time management hard for a child. Some children just can’t accurately judge the passage of time. Twenty minutes may pass while the child experiences it as if only a few minutes went by. Or the child figures it will take her minutes to put on clothes and make-up whereas it never takes her less than 25 minutes for the task. Some kids can’t judge how long it will take to dress, eat breakfast, clean up and get ready for the bus, despite the fact that they must do it every day. Keep in mind that many adults have the same problem! If your child has conceptual difficulties around time, he or she will need extra help. SIt down with the youngster and ask him or her to make guesses of how long each task takes. The next day actually time each tastk. If the child is overor underestimated, discuss the differnces. Help the child make a more realistic schedule and have him or her check off the times that are actually required for each task. Close monitoring for a few days may reveal a few “leaks” in the system – just a couple of places where more time must be realistically allotted.

Accidental Reinforcement
Sometimes a child gets a lot of attention for being late. A parent might call him, scold him, encourage him, help him, and otherwise be all over him all morning long to make sure he is moving on time. This can be a lot of attention! Children sometimes enjoy all the “help” and attention they get from their parents around the issue of arriving on time. Even if this attention is unpleasant (scolding, reprimanding, threatening and punishing), the child might “enjoy” it, because negative attention is better than no attention at all. So be careful to check your own behavior to ensure that you are not talking to the child a lot in order to help him or her be ready on time. Stop the reminders, the assistance, the threatening and all the other attention. Go have your own breakfast and relax. The child will probably beg for attention in the beginning, so you must be firm in your resolve not to give it. After awhile, the child will realize that no more attention is coming and he or she will begin to act more normally.

Arrives Late

Does your child have a tendency to arrive late to his or her commitments? Whatever reason your child may have for tardiness, it’s important that as parents, you don’t take the behavior lightly. Occasional lateness can easily grow into a pervasive negative attitude about time and punctuality. The sooner you can wean kids out of a tendency for arriving late, the faster you can instill more appropriate behavior.

If your child has a tendency to arrive late, consider the following questions:

Is Your Child Motivated? 
Lack of motivation can be a factor in chronic tardiness. For example, a child who is always late for school may be a child who finds school boring, demanding or just plain awful. A child who is interested in the lessons and the classroom environment, on the other hand, can’t wait to get to class! If you feel that lack of motivation is behind your child’s tardiness, then consider ways to make things more interesting for them. It may be possible to arrange a meeting with teachers. Or it may be possible to give your child a reason to arrive early (i.e. more time to play with the new electronic device you just bought him).

Is Your Child Disorganized and Forgetful?
Consider the possibility that your child can use some help in arranging and systematizing his or her schedule. Not knowing where things are, forgetting appointments and schedules, and scrambling to get ready can all be causes for habitual tardiness. Get your child a calendar as well as a to-do list. Help him or her remember commitments through occasional reminders. And instill the habit of checking the night before if everything is ready for a trip. Adequate preparation can go a long way in cutting tardiness among young people.

Does Your Child Respect People’s Time?
Some children, especially teenagers, are prone to arriving late because they don’t value the time of the people they are about to meet. Perhaps they are confident that the other person will wait —- an event can’t start without everyone present, right? Or maybe they just don’t care if the people waiting for them get offended or annoyed. If this is the case, then it’s best parents teach children how important time is to a lot of people. In the same way that they don’t want their own time wasted, neither should they waste other people’s time.

Does Your Child Underestimate Preparation and Travel Time?
Some children are sincere in their desire to come on schedule. The problem is, they have a tendency to underestimate the amount of time it takes to prepare or to travel to a location. For example, they may feel that travel time is just 15 minutes when in fact it’s 30 minutes! If this is the case, then teach your child to be more realistic about their time projections. It would also help to always put a comfortable allowance when setting schedules to account for unexpected turn of events like heavy traffic.

Is Your Child a Conformist?
It sometimes happens that your every lesson on punctuality at home gets negated by a peer group who is always late. Kids don’t want to be the overeager beaver in class – it’s just not cool! If your child is developing a habit towards lateness due to peer pressure, then it’s best to teach him the importance of making decisions based on personal values. Peer pressure may feel very powerful, but it cannot overwhelm a child who values his own mind. Reinforce the positive side of being unique and living according to your principles.

Use Effective Rewards or Punishments
Show your child that YOU value promptness by rewarding prompt behavior or punishing lateness. In the “real world” people can lose their jobs for showing up late. At home, they can lose their privileges. In the real world, prompt behavior is acknowledged in positive work reviews and recommendations. At home, it can earn privileges. Put your money where your mouth is: show your child that you really care about time matters by backing up your words with your actions.

Afraid of Needles

Nobody enjoys getting a needle, but getting the occasional needle is a fact of life. Babies, kids and teens get them for immunizations as well as for blood tests and other routine medical care. Some children who have been treated in a hospital have endured intravenous injections as well. In fact, no one knows when they might have to receive a needle for emergency medical care. This being the case, it is highly inconvenient to have an intense fear of needles! Unfortunately, many kids are afraid of the pain that accompanies receiving a needle and some children have an actual needle phobia – a reaction involving irrational terror and panic.

If your child is afraid of needles, consider the following tips:

Use Emotional Coaching
If your child is afraid of getting a needle, try using emotional coaching. Emotional coaching is the naming and accepting of feelings. In this scenario, you can say such things as “I know you’re afraid the needle will hurt,” or “I know you don’t want to have the needle – nobody really likes getting needles.” Acknowledge your child’s fears without minimizing or discounting them. For instance, DON’T tell him the needle won’t hurt or that it’s not such a big deal or that he is being a baby! When you simply accept the fact that he’s fearful, it actually helps take away some of the fear. However, if your acceptance does nothing to minimize feelings of panic, it is still valuable: it shows the child that you take his feelings seriously. This helps develops the child’s emotional intelligence which, over time, helps the child have greater comfort with his own and other people’s feelings. (Emotional Intelligence also leads to success in every area of functioning.)

Be Careful Not to Reinforce Fears
Avoidance makes fears worse – don’t solve the problem by letting your child skip the needle if it isn’t absolutely necessary or if it can be taken on a later date. Moreover, try not to show excessive interest in the fear (i.e. by constantly talking about it). Make your communications and interventions on the topic brief, matter-of-fact and low-key.

Try Simple Techniques First
Some kids can be bribed out of their fear, so if offering a treat or privilege helps to distract the child from fear, then go ahead and do it. Similarly, if distracting the child at the time of the needle with a joke, a funny face, a question or a puppet will help the child get through the moment comfortably, then go for it! However, if your child’s anticipatory anxiety is way too high for such simple interventions, then consider the techniques below.

Teach Strategies to Cope with Fear
Teach your child how to use his imagination to help him stay calm and confident. Right now, your child is imagining his skin being painfully punctured. He is fixated on the moment of pain. You can instruct him to imagine the time period AFTER the needle – he can picture himself leaving the doctor’s office with a nice lollipop in his mouth, or a storybook that you’ve bought for him, or (if he’s older) the new game on his handheld device. (Of course, you don’t really have to get the child anything new; he can just imagine having one of his old favorites with him!) Imagination is strengthened by asking the child to close his eyes and cross his arms across his chest, Indian Chief style. He should then picture leaving the doctor’s office happily while he taps alternating left, right, left, right with his hands on his upper arms or shoulders. Tapping like this for one to three minutes is all that is necessary and can be repeated whenever he starts to feel fearful. Bi-lateral tapping helps the imagination take root deep in the mind where it can affect the emotional centers.   Another thing you can do, is teach your youngster breathing techniques to help calm his nerves, particularly when he is about to receive his needle. One simple technique that is easy to teach is to have your child think the word “in” while breathing in and think the word “out” while breathing out.  In addition,  you might look into a fear-busting technique called Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT). This is a simple form of acupressure that you can do with your child before his gets his needle. It involves tapping lightly on your child’s body on meridian pathways on the face, chest and fingers. In many cases, the technique causes the fear to completely disappear in a matter of minutes. In other cases, it brings the fear down to a more manageable level. There are many internet resources for learning EFT – a very easy and quick technique to reduce fear and other negative emotions.

A Needle Phobia May be a Genetic Condition
While fears can be acquired after bad experiences, phobic reactions are biological vulnerabilities – a child can inherit the tendency to have one or more phobias. (If a child develops panic around needles because of having had a life-threatening experience involving a needle, then it may be part of Post-traumatic Stress Disorder rather than a simple phobia.) Therefore, if your child has a complete meltdown, cries, absolutely refuses to cooperate with the doctor (or even go to the doctor), it is possible that he or she is suffering from the very common mental health disorder known as Simple Phobia. There is nothing “simple” about such a phobia from a parent’s point of view, however, since the child’s overwhelming reaction makes it extremely challenging to provide the proper medical care. Some children will calm down, however, if given a few drops of Rescue Remedy in water. Rescue Remedy is a harmless water-based remedy – a special type of Bach Flower preparation – that is used for intense upset and overwhelming experiences. It helps turn off the fight-or-flight response. Although it is useful in the moment for a child who must have a needle, proper treatment with Bach Flower Therapy can help prevent the panic from happening in the future (see below).

Experiment with Bach Flowers
Bach Flower Therapy is a naturopathic treatment that can ease emotional distress and even prevent it from occurring in the future. It treats every type of emotional disturbance (fear, panic, worry, anger, tantrums, low mood, guilt, perfectionism and so on). When your child worries obsessively (i.e. can’t stop thinking about the needle that he is going to have), you can give him the flower remedy called White Chestnut. For specific fears (like the fear of needles) you can use the remedy Mimulus. The remedy Rock Rose is used for feelings of panic. You can mix several remedies together in one treatment bottle. To do so, you fill a one-ounce Bach Mixing Bottle with water (a mixing bottle is an empty bottle with a glass dropper, sold in health food stores along with Bach Flower Remedies). Next, add two drops of each remedy that you want to use. Finally, add one teaspoon of brandy. The bottle is now ready to use. Give your child four drops of the mixture in any liquid (juice, water, milk, tea, etc.) four times a day (morning, mid-day, afternoon and evening). Remedies can be taken with or without food. Continue this treatment until the fear is gone. Start treatment again if the fear returns. Bach Flower Therapy can help melt fears out of the system over time and can compliment any other treatment the child is receiving.

Professional Assessment and Treatment
If your interventions have not helped your child face needles more comfortably, you can have him or her assessed by a mental health professional. A short course of professional treatment may help your child manage this fear much better.