Don't panic! Take some time to talk with your helpers - spouse, doctor, friends, whoever. Think things through. Do a bit of computer research - find out the facts and fantasies about teens & internet porn (is it addictive? is it dangerous?) You'll need all this in order to have a reasonable and thoughtful discussion with your kids. When you are armed with information and a calm attitude, sit down with your boys and let them know that you know about their activties. Raise your concerns. Tell them your expectations. Ask them if they are doing this for fun, stress relief or what - maybe there are healthier ways to address their needs. Don't pathologize the activity because it is certainly normal in today's world (in the sense of "common") but simply share with them the problems you think this activity is creating or could create in the future. Feel free as a parent, to put filters on the computer and to let them know that there will be no computer privacy - if this is the way you want to go.
Sarah Chana