It is actually true that adults can act as bad as or worse than kids - all of us can do it sometimes. Spouses need to help each other do their best. Sometimes, however, spouses just attack each other rather than support each other's growth. Men and their sons often have conflict - perhaps it has something to do with testosterone or the male psyche. Whatever the reason, if you can help smooth things out then each of them will be happier. If you're going to parent your spouse, however (and everyone must raise their spouse to their highest potential), use your good parenting techniques - the ones you use with your child and the ones you want your husband to use! Use positive reinforcement, positive feedback, emotional coaching and any of the other good-feeling strategies you'll find in my book Raise Your Kids without Raising Your Voice. Just change the title to Raise Your Spouse without Raising Your Voice and substitute the word "spouse" whenever you read "child!" Believe me, it will work just fine! Criticism and nagging are not included in the preferred techniques, so you 'll have to stop that and develop a more positive action plan. Good luck!  Sarah Chana