Never say "never!" As long as she's living in your house, you can continue to parent her. Even after she leaves home, you'll still be a major influence in her life and can still have a positive impact. Your daughter does need to get a grip before she enters adult relationships - otherwise, her happiness may be severely compromised. Therefore, do everything you can to teach her that drama does not work. For instance, let her know that when she has a violent fit (and describe what you mean by that), there are going to be 2 consequences. One is a natural consequence: you won't feel friendly toward her. People don't feel friendly toward those who abuse them. Your relationship with her could be warm and friendly, but if she insists on being aggressive, then the relationship will be damaged and need repair (which can take time). The second consequence is that you will deprive her of one of the on-going privileges in your household. For instance, do you supply her with a cell phone? If so, it can be removed for a couple of weeks or even a month (I'd say that if she is verbally aggressive it should cost 2 weeks of cell phone and if she is physically aggressive, one month). If she pays for her own phone or doesn't have one, there might be other privileges she enjoys: the use of your computer, car, cooking/laundry/housekeeping services or whatever. Give a consequence that will feel like a consequence. This should happen each time. Now, if the violence is really violent, tell her that you will call the police if that kind of action occurs again. Let the police explain to her what physical assault is and what its consequences are. (Call your local police station first and find out what would happen if you called them because your daughter threw something at you.) You can also insist on anger-management counseling as the "cost" of being allowed to continue to live under your roof. Call a mental health professional if you want more ideas on how to solve this problem once and for all.  Sarah Chana