Although it's true your kids need you, it's also important to recognize that YOU need you and that must be taken care of first. You need to have compassion for yourself - lower your expectations and standards to something more humane. No one person can do everything.Of course you're irritable - you can't manage everything that's on your plate and you are tired. I don't know if you are working or not but it doesn't matter - what you are saying is that your day is too much for you. If you are more gentle toward yourself, your gentleness will actually pour over to the kids as well. Make it a priority to do small acts of kindness for YOURSELF every day. Become a bit selfish - no one else is looking after you, so you might as well be the one to do it and do it well. It needn't be big, time-consuming or expensive - small tokens of affection offered to #1 (that's YOU), send a big healing message to the psyche. This gives a person more energy, more hope, more optimism and more love to pour out to others. So try to find little things that are meaningful to you personally - everyone is different. You might consider any of the following types of treats and small favors to yourself: a chocolate a day, 15 minutes reading something pleasureable - uninterrupted, a bubble bath with special soaps & oils, a manicure, 10 minutes feet up eyes closed every 4 hours, a creative project that can be done in small steps, beautiful music in the kitchen while you cook, some daily social contact, making time for prayer, reading/watching something really funny each day and so on. Think of all these as stress-busters. The more you indulge yourself, the better you will function. If possible, do the biggest stress buster of all - seek some professional support. Professional counseling can help people dig their way out of those dark holes.    Sarah Chana