My Child Keeps Breaking Things

Kids break things all the time. It’s normal. The body of a child is not yet fully developed; they may not yet be skilled in physical coordination. They’re also naturally curious, and would have no qualms touching things that they shouldn’t, or “operating” on toys to see how they work.

But what parent would want their kids to remain clumsy! Aside from physical risk that comes with being surrounded with broken things (and the cost of having to replace so much damaged stuff!), there’s also the impact of clumsiness on a child’s self-esteem. A child who habitually breaks things may feel that they’re not capable. They may also internalize the shame that comes from being noticed or reprimanded all the time.

If you have a child prone to breaking things, consider the following ways to help:

Childproof your home!

First off, prevention is better than cure. If you want to help your child avoid breaking things, don’t put porcelain and china in places they could reach. Save fancy mirrors and glass doors until your kids are older. And don’t buy toys so expensive, you don’t actually want them played with!

Talk to your kid.

At first they may seem unrelated, but talking to your kid --- whether about their clumsy behavior, or about something else entirely – can help a child feel more at ease with himself. After all, constantly breaking things may just be a sign that your child is nervous, self-conscious or needs encouragement.

The important thing is to talk to your kids in a manner that would make them feel comfortable. They say that the same message elicits different responses depending on the manner of conveying the message. When you talk to your kid, it’s important to have the proper attitude. Don’t scold or shout if your kid keeps breaking things. Your child will internalize fear of making a mistake. For a child to be receptive to instruction and correction, a child must feel safe.

It impacts a child whenever he or she sees parents disappointed. Avoid making your child feel ashamed. Instead, talk with your kid why there are things he or she must not touch. Explain for instance how grandma would feel if she learns her favorite figurine is broken.

Let your kid help with the clean-up.

Emphasize the idea that while what’s broken can’t always be fixed, it’s a sign of maturity is to clean up after. Older kids may help in the actual clean-up; younger kids can fetch the dustpan or trashcan. Letting kids helping in the clean-up can be a way to teach responsibility.

Encourage your child to help around the house.

At times, clumsiness is a symptom of being overprotective parents. Kids who are not given opportunities to learn how to do certain tasks, may end up being awkward at them – and this awkwardness may be mistaken for clumsiness. Teach your kids to be more confident and competent by giving them tasks.

You can always find tasks appropriate to your child’s age and stage of development. Setting up the dining table may be a task not suitable for a young child, but there are aspects of it that they can manage. For instance, they can bring the napkin and silverware to the table as these are not breakable. There are also house chores that require carrying around things that kids can participate in. You can ask them to arrange books or magazines in the receiving area, carry laundry to the washing machine or bring out the garbage.

Congratulate your kid.

A kid’s heart flutters whenever parents give praises, and even more when somebody else hears. Always commend your kid for helping out in the house chore, for being able to do it properly and for not breaking anything. This will not only boost the confidence of your kid but also encourage him/her to perform better.

Remember that every time your kid breaks something, they feel bad about it, and as a parent you need to reinforce the idea that your kid is capable of doing good and being trusted.